Feelings.

I am pretty sure peeps can relate to having a constant inner dialogue. Mostly mine is happy, positive and upbeat. Sometimes though, like today, I am consumed with the need of the world. Ever feel like no matter how much good you do its still not enough?

I try to give of myself at least weekly. Whether financially or just giving my time. I hear of a good cause and I want to help.



The economy with the price of oil right now is a little scary. My husband is definitely our main income (and also the reason why I am able to help as much) and right now things are really unsure. I am a very positive person and have a lot of faith. When one door closes one door opens.

I know a lot of peeps who don't have that positivity right now. Its hard for them to be positive when they are jobless. I just want to fix everything. I cannot. At what point do we let other peoples struggles go? Say a prayer and not obsess. This is where I struggle.

I will say that it is hard for me to take a family vacation when there are children going without food. Why should I go to _____ for week and lay on the beach if that money could be spent on feeding someone who is hungry. I wonder if this is a disorder?
I see a need and cant let it go.

I had a panic attack when buying a new home. There are people who are homeless and here I am worrying about getting a bigger home. It hardly seems fair. I seriously had to justify it to myself by telling myself that I would have a business that could help people too. When I bought a new car it was only because I was getting stuck in my old one. I have very little value on material things. Some of my richest friends have hardly any money. I don't care whether you are a doctor or a garbage truck driver. I care if you have a good heart! 

I used to always donate privately. I once shared with my friends and family that I knew of a family in need and saw that it could be more helpful to share. I was a little shocked to hear that someone I had called a friend said I was "bragging" about helping others. I hope no one ever thinks that. I will continue to do whatever I can whether privately or publically. If I think it could help to share a story I will.

Those are my inner ramblings for today. Are you ever consumed with others needs? How do you handle it?

From the Heart of,
Di
xx